EPISODE 4 – THE VICE OF TEENAGE PROMISCUITY

The heart of man is naturally inclined to certain dirty acts. ‘Naturally’ here would imply the total absence of willpower on the part of the person in question. I remember the very first time I heard about ‘puberty.’ I must have been about nine years old or thereabout and I remember stumbling on the word in one of BD’s integrated science notebooks. The word sounded pretty catchy and on further probing, I got to understand what it meant. I understood puberty for boys meant a deeper voice, development of pubic hair in the armpit and ‘down there’ and stuff like that and somehow, I could hardly wait to get to that stage. On much more further probing I got to know that I wouldn’t get to that stage till I was about twelve or thirteen! I discovered I had a long wait coming.

For me, growing up was fun to an extent, (at least my first nine years before my parents’ separation) and I did all those things children did – the sand and stone games, the hide-and-seek and the ‘daddy and mummy’ game. Actually, the last one was my favourite especially because I always got to play Daddy all the time and my first childhood crush, Tosin always got to play Mummy. I must have been about five or six then but I already knew what it felt like to be attracted to a girl. (Yes I was attracted to Tosin like hell!). In fact, I had begun to have erections sometimes and so when I read about the puberty thing, I wondered if one of the signs of puberty was the possibility to have erections. I guess I was wrong especially because of what little kids of nowadays do, all in the name of playing silly games. Like I said earlier, the heart (regardless of age now) is naturally inclined to. . . well, you know the rest. Well, let’s go back to the real story.

I finally succumbed to Chief’s advice and enrolled for the JAMB/UME classes in March 2003. By this time, Dorothy, the house maid cum part time sexual partner had been ‘fired’ by my step-mom Cyan and I had to live with a step-cousin who saw smoking as his only reason for existence. On the smoking thing, it felt like fun on the first day like I said in the last episode and you can imagine Emma’s joy on seeing me smoke. It was similar to the joy of an evangelist who had succeeded in winning a soul for the kingdom, only in this case my step-cousin was the smoking evangelist who had won a new soul for the smokers’ kingdom. However, just like the new convert in the Christian race usually gets bored after a while (except by the grace of God), I began to get bored with smoking, especially since my chain-smoking step-cousin always wanted me to accompany him all the time whenever he went on his smoking sprees. Sometimes, we sneaked to smoke like five times a day! It was that bad and it was at this point I decided I couldn’t live like that. All the while, I smoked just for the fun of it and not because I enjoyed it but it appeared Emma was determined to further integrate me into this new type of race. Soon, he got tired and decided to let me be. In fact, before long he was on his way back to the U.K.

In between attending my coaching classes, I longed for the sexual feel again, especially since I had gotten so used to the act with Dorothy. At seventeen, I was still pretty shy and I had never asked a girl out before so getting laid seemed to be an impossible task. I decided to improvise and resorted to peeking through the bathroom key hole whenever Elfy and Liz were having their baths and usually, I got an eyeful. It was more like live pornography and only God knows how I managed not to ever get caught while indulging in such dirty acts. I never got caught peeking but I got caught doing something much more degrading (well maybe not) and this time it was Chief himself who caught me. When I remember this experience, I often laugh to myself. On that fateful day, I had sneaked into my dad’s personal drawer; one drawer in the living room he kept permanently locked. Somehow, Chief had forgotten to lock up and my eyes caught the keys hanging right on the lock. I decided to check out what my old man had been hiding forever in that sacred drawer and on checking, I discovered some movies, not just movies now – pornographic movies. There was quite a good number. I was shell-shocked and while I was trying to recover from the shock, I heard someone right behind me and I turned hastily to find myself staring at my dad. I thought I would collapse at that moment. . . . . . . . . TO BE CONTINUED.

SEE YOU IN THE NEXT EPISODE OF GEEBEE’s TRIP!